Friday, May 29, 2009

Pet Names

Jennifer is at it again. Today she started talking about how she wants another dog and what she would call it. A few years ago she wanted a hound dog so she could name it Elvis. Now she wants a lap dog that she can “dress up” and call it Pucci. She already has two dogs: Turbo and Junior, but she hates the name Junior. She says it’s just not right that a songwriter, someone who is so good coming up with the perfect words, has a stupid dog name so she tells people Junior is short for Edmund Von Schnauzer Junior. (She was going to call him "Tyson" because the first day they got him, he bit Turbo's ear - but her husband nixed the name).
For dog number three she is toying with the idea of calling him “good dog” because she thought it would be funny to say “bad, good dog.” Or calling him “Here Boy” and watching him run to everyone in the neighborhood (or park) who’s calling his dog. The pick right now is “Rut Row.”
I told her she was just daring me to write a blog. She said, “I double dog dare you.” So – here it is.

Monday, May 25, 2009

Bad to the Bone

Children’s photos (He's not even three yet!) are sure different than they were when I was raising my kids:

I liked this one so much (especially the "MOM" tattoo) that I used it as the CD label for a selection of Jennifer's "Bad Boy" songs (you can listen to them at )

Saturday, May 23, 2009

It's a Man's World

All my life I’ve been grateful that I was a woman. Now that I’m older, and supposedly wiser, I see great advantages to being a man. If you’re a man, you’ve got it pretty dang easy:

“You can never be pregnant.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
Same work, more pay.
People never stare at your chest when they're talking to you.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades (and your hair cuts are waaaay cheaper than ours)
Your face is good just the way it is (count the number of “must haves” in your wife’s cabinet!)
One wallet (and no handbag to lug around)
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.”
(edited from an e-mail I received lately)

In my next life, I want to be you. No, actually, I’d want to be my daughters. They’ve got it even better than you. I’d trade your stuff for their stuff any day.

Friday, May 22, 2009

Tacky Grave Site

There ought to be a law against this:

If anyone in my family does this to my grave, I'll never speak to them again!
(this is the best argument for cremation I've ever seen - I may consider it after all)

Thursday, May 21, 2009

American Idol Finale - Season 8

Okay, I got it wrong. Silly me. I predicted Adam Lambert would win, hands down, no contest. However, I forgot to factor in one important thing: Americans rally around underdogs! At this point, it doesn’t really matter who comes in first and who comes in second. Adam Lambert will leave Kris Allen in his dust when it comes to concert tickets sold and number of records sold. Kris Allen’s support is primarily in the U.S., whereas Adam’s is already world-wide (I know this because I track the number of hits that come to my page looking for Adam Lambert’s photo and they are coming from all over the world – including the Czech Republic, Peru, India, Iceland, and other random countries).
Let’s take a stroll down memory lane and see what past seasons have looked like:
Season 1: Kelly Clarkson over Justin Guarini (we got it right – but it took Kelly several years to really take off. )
Season 2: Ruben Studdard over Clay Aiken. Both underdogs. But Clay is making more money than Ruben. However neither one could live up to the title “Idol.”
Season 3: Fantasia over Diana DeGarmo. America got it right – or did they? Fantasia’s light is being extinguished by the fourth (or was it fifth?) runner up: Jennifer Hudson (She made $5 million last year. Carrie Underwood is the only one who beat that).
Season 4: Carrie Underwood over Bo Bice. Duh! Carrie has sold 9.6 million albums and made $14 million dollars last year. (Highest paid idol)
Season 5: Taylor Hicks over Katharine McPhee. Talk about an underdog. Taylor’s fans all switched over to the Season 6 contestant - Sanjaya. Taylor has made the least money (only $300,000 last year) Chris Daughtry on the other hand is rockin’ out and living up to the “Idol” name, even though he didn’t make it to the top three.
Season 6: Jordan sparks over Blake Lewis. Eh. That whole season left me cold.
Season 7: David Cook over David Archuleta . They are both currently doing very well. Time will tell.
Seriously America - Picking Kris over Adam is like picking Pat Boone over Elvis.
Note: As soon as the show ended, I got a phone call from my oldest daughter, Amy. She said, "I'm glad you don't live in a two story house. I'd be calling to talk you off the ledge. Are you okay with Adam Lambert losing?" I just laughed. Actually, being THE American Idol wouldn't really be a good thing for the kind of Rock Star performer he intends to be. He's better off being the runner up. She said, "What was with the 'wings?' " I told her to get used to it. He's going to shock the H. E. double L. out of his fans with his 9" platforms, flaming stages and such. She said, "Are you okay with that?" I said, "Sure. I'm down with it." Then she laughed to hear her 64 year old mother talk about being "down with" platforms, wings, and flaming stages. Just as long as he doesn't come around wanting to date my daughters...and I'm pretty safe in saying that would never happen. So, Adam. Even though I, personally, won't be going to your concerts or buying your records (rock just isn't my thing), I think you are going to rock the world.
"I tink I gonna go over to da couch now. Where da couch? "
(Dean Martin)

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

The Color of America is Changing

I just ran across an article in U.S.A. Today (dated 5/14/09) which pointed out that 43% of Americans younger than 20 are minorities and 47% of children younger than 5 are minorities (with Hispanics having the highest growth rate).

According to the census bureau, the Hispanic population is growing three times faster than the total U.S. population due to high birth rates and continued high immigration.
Right now, in America, whites are in the majority (65%) -but that is going to change (as early as 2022 - and by 2050, whites will comprise 46% of the population. Again, the fastest growing group among the non-whites is the Hispanic population.

Note to self: In order to protect my own rights as an American in the future, I have to be sure to protect the rights of minorities in general today because it won't be long before I am one!

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Money can't buy happiness - BUT...

Money can't buy happiness but LACK of money can bring you sadness (if you can't provide for your family ) and can certainly cause stress in your life (if you can't pay your mortgage or your car payment, etc.). I think we can ALL agree that it is better to have money than not to have it.
The best way to have money is not to spend all the money you get. Another way to increase what you have is to decrease what you owe. Cut up your credit cards and only pay cash for what you buy. Learn to distinguish between "wants" and "needs." Only borrow money for things you "need." If you don't have enough money to buy groceries, you don't have enough money to buy a lottery ticket (you might as well flush that money down the toilet). Make a budget and stick to it. All this is easier said than done. But you need to do it.
It's not about having money - it's more about avoiding NOT having it.

Monday, May 18, 2009

Computer Addict Alert

I'm not joining any 10-step programs until I get this message. . . again.
(According to Maxine, "Home computers are the perfect thing for women who don't feel that men provide them with enough frustration").

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Job Security

Your boss may not always be right - but he's always your boss!


“You can’t please all of the people all of the time,
But I suggest you start with me


Saturday, May 16, 2009

Women's Lib

I hate woman’s libbers. There have been some good things to come from legislation they managed to get passed. However, I believe they’ve done more harm than good to our society as a whole.

There are women who would rather have careers than have babies. They have a right to that choice and they should be paid the same as a man doing the same job.

What I object to is that women who chose to have babies have bought into the idea that they should be able to be both mothers and career women. Very few can succeed at both. One always suffers and it’s usually the family. Just look at the generation of young people produced by the “liberated” woman. They were raised by day care workers until they were old enough to be home alone. Mom came home too tired to do what a mother should do – mother her children.

When my daughters were toddlers, I remember going to cocktail parties where the first thing another woman would ask you was, “What business are you in?” Most of the women there had started their own business in town. One opened up a kitchen shop (she was divorced four years later), one opened up an exclusive women’s boutique (she went bankrupt), and another started a catering business (she quit after two years). The point is, at the time, they looked down their noses at me for being satisfied to be a stay at home mom (one had the gall to say, “Oh how plebeian.” )

Being a stay at home mom may not be rewarding and fulfilling on a daily basis. But neither is being a career woman. I know because I was one before I had children. I’ve never regretted being a stay at home mom. In the end, the woman who can look at her offspring with pride can pat herself on the back and say, “Well done.”

I subscribe to President David O. McKay’s saying, “No other success can compensate for failure in the home.”

While I’m on the subject of Women’s Liberation. I’d like to put in my two cents regarding their change of focus over the years. In the sixties, I actually supported the movement because they were giving women options. They supported women. They encouraged women to dare to dream. They gave women a voice. But somehow that has taken a back seat to the current focus which has evolved into a strictly left wing political agenda and they only support women who share their political views. Two current cases in point: Sarah Palin and Carrie Prejean. Their silence in support of these women was deafening.

Friday, May 15, 2009

Are your FEET ready for summer?

Women always stress as summer approaches because they have to get their bodies in shape for swim suits. But it won’t matter how good your body looks if your feet are nasty. Are your feet ready for summer? Before you walk out the door in your favorite sandals, take a good look at your feet and see if you pass the test:
1. Always wear sandals that fit. Toes should not hang over the front, nor should heels spill over the backs. And the sides and tops of your feet should not pudge out between the straps.

2. Go polish-free or vow to keep the polish fresh, intact and chip-free. (Do not cheat and just touch up your big toes. )
3. Use a pumice stone (every day!) and follow up with Dr Scholl's moisturizer to keep your heels from getting dry and cracked.
Take a look in a mirror so you get other angles…did you pass? Enjoy your day. If not, spend a week or two getting your feet in shape.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

Fat Girl Shopping

I'll bet you all can't wait to run out and buy this figure-flattering outfit. Ha! But this is what I found as high-end fashion at Saks Fifth Avenue. Just the jacket is $492 (well, it is actually on sale right now - for "only" $295 - ooooh such a "bargain"). Sorry girls, but these are the kinds of clothes that are waiting for you once you start wearing sizes 14 and up.

My daughters used to give me grief about the clothes I brought home, so one day they decided to take me shopping. When we arrived at the "fat girl" department, they looked around and Jennifer said, "Oh. I see what you mean. Sorry mom."
According to the center for disease control, 34% of American women are "obese." If you take a poll, 62% of American women consider themselves to be "overweight" - So, I ask you (again), why aren't there designers out there seriously designing for the over size 14 crowd?? I say seriously because there are a number of big time designers that are making clothes for plus sizes. But they really don't understand the plus size figure. They think to make something plus size you have to lengthen the jacket and widen the sleeves and that's it. Wrong! All that does is make the plus size woman look bigger! They need to get some plus sized models in and design clothes that look good on them. How hard would that be?
. .
So usually when I say I'm going shopping, what I mean is I'm going "fat girl" shopping - which means I'm looking for shoes, handbags, jewelry, or make up.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

American Idol

Adam Lambert is a "Rock God" - (Told you so ).
Tune in tonight to see if he makes it to the final two...duh.

Monday, May 11, 2009

Wacky Warning Labels

On a cell phone: “don’t try to dry your phone in a microwave oven” (would anyone really do that? )

On furniture-cleaning cloths: "Do not use as baby wipes" (So that's why baby smells like Lemon Pledge).

Under big rigs and mixer trucks: "Do not use a blow torch near gas tank" (they had to put that warning up after a man died using a blow torch under a concrete mixer truck - I guess people really are stupid)

"The Original Off-Road Commode" won this year's "Wacky Warning Labels" contest, Steve Shiflett of Hampton, Ga., won $500 for submitting the toilet seat's warning that it's "not for use on moving vehicles." (really? Who'd have thunk?)

Daniel Berganini of Fridley, Minn., won the second-place prize of $250 for a line in a wart-removal product's instruction guide that is unlikely to reach its targeted audience: "Do not use if you cannot see clearly to read the information in the information booklet."

"Do not eat the LCD panel," warns a label on a 1-by-4-inch LCD screen, a finalist submitted by David Almcrantz of Goleta, Calif. (must be an attractive nuisance for 3-year olds)

Past winners include a small tractor that cautioned "Danger: Avoid Death," and a warning not to put people inside a washing machine (anyone with small boys wouldn’t think this warning was unwarranted. The only question is, if you warn the boys NOT to do it, will that give them the idea to do it???)

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Mother's Day

This is my mom - Happy Mother's Day Mommy!

Job Title for Mothers:
"Research associate in the field of child development and human relations"

Things my mother taught me:
My mother taught me CONSIDERATION FOR OTHERS when she said, "I just scrubbed that floor. Go outside and bleed in the grass."

My mother taught me HUMOR when she said, "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

My mother taught me GENETICS when she said, "You are just like your father!"

My mother taught me JUSTICE when she said, "One day you will have kids, and I hope they turn out just like YOU...then you'll see what it's like."
(ha ha - I actually DID have children that turned out exactly like me...perfect in every way!)
Last, but not least, If at first you don't succeed, do it the way your mother taught you.

Friday, May 8, 2009

Happy 5th Anniversary Amy & Kyle!

May 8, 2004

(No, they didn't get married on the merry-go-round. They got married in the San Diego Temple - then took their whole bridal party to Belmont park to ride the merry-go-round and the roller coaster. Then they went to the beach:

Then they went to the reception and danced all night.

Monday, May 4, 2009

Cinco de Mayo

Women Gone Wild
Daryl, me, Sue

Cinco de Mayo makes me think of all things Mexican - and in particular, the mother/daughter cruises to Mexico we used to take when the girls were teenagers (we started out with the three day cruise to Catalina and Ensenada, then extended to the five day cruise to Ensenada, Mazatlan and Cabo San Lucas). My two crazy pals and I would be in one cabin, and their daughters and my two girls were in the cabin next to us (so we could keep track of their comings and goings without being in their face). Since we all live in San Diego, it was an inexpensive vacation for us and it was great bonding time for all. We did it every other year until one of the girls got married. Our girls always hit it big with the cruise staff - especially the waiters. After a few years, when we'd walk in for dinner the first night, the waiters would applaud and come hug the girls. They knew the party was starting.

Sunday, May 3, 2009

2-Ingredient Drink

Summer Cooler

3 cups fresh melon (watermelon or cantaloupe), seeds removed and roughly chopped
1 1/2 cups Minute Maid Lemonade (I use Light - only 15 calories)

Place ingredients in a blender and process until smooth. Chill and serve over ice.

Great for breakfast, lunch, around pool, and especially good with Mexican food.

Saturday, May 2, 2009

Happy Birthday Kyle!

Kyle with Lincoln (age 2-1/2)

Lincoln says, "You are the best daddy on the planet!" We all agree!

Friday, May 1, 2009

Favorite Wedding Photo:

My nephew's wife is a wedding photographer in Oregon. I checked out her website and she takes amazing photos. She has a way of capturing the personality of a wedding. What do you do when you have a group of groomsmen who are so different in size, shape, and personality? Play it up and have fun with it! I love it.

If you know anyone who is getting married, have them check out: