Monday, May 11, 2009

Wacky Warning Labels

On a cell phone: “don’t try to dry your phone in a microwave oven” (would anyone really do that? )

On furniture-cleaning cloths: "Do not use as baby wipes" (So that's why baby smells like Lemon Pledge).

Under big rigs and mixer trucks: "Do not use a blow torch near gas tank" (they had to put that warning up after a man died using a blow torch under a concrete mixer truck - I guess people really are stupid)

"The Original Off-Road Commode" won this year's "Wacky Warning Labels" contest, Steve Shiflett of Hampton, Ga., won $500 for submitting the toilet seat's warning that it's "not for use on moving vehicles." (really? Who'd have thunk?)

Daniel Berganini of Fridley, Minn., won the second-place prize of $250 for a line in a wart-removal product's instruction guide that is unlikely to reach its targeted audience: "Do not use if you cannot see clearly to read the information in the information booklet."

"Do not eat the LCD panel," warns a label on a 1-by-4-inch LCD screen, a finalist submitted by David Almcrantz of Goleta, Calif. (must be an attractive nuisance for 3-year olds)

Past winners include a small tractor that cautioned "Danger: Avoid Death," and a warning not to put people inside a washing machine (anyone with small boys wouldn’t think this warning was unwarranted. The only question is, if you warn the boys NOT to do it, will that give them the idea to do it???)

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